“One’s destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things.” – Henry Miller

“We live in a wonderful world that is full of beauty, charm and adventure. There is no end to the adventures we can have if only we seek them with our eyes open.” – Jawaharial Nehru 
Half Way There,
Seems impossible really.
Sitting in my room, 100 steps from the ocean, 5 blocks from the mall, a bus ride away from school and 5539 miles from Minnesota, I have made it 2 months here in Viña, learning something 
new with each day: 

whether it be about myself, we have gotten to know each other a lot in the past few weeks, 
or about my host culture, analyzing my home culture, new phrases, what's acceptable and what's not, learning patience from others, it's not easy dealing with the gringa constantly stumbling over her words,
taking a step back to be proud of myself because sometimes I need to learn to give myself credit...
“The use of traveling is to regulate imagination by reality, and instead of thinking how things may be, to see them as they are.” –Samuel Johnson 
The most difficult thing is realizing the separation between the life here and the one at home; what you choose to grab ahold of and make it part of you. Because it's a risk. A huge one. It could be the best decision for you, or one that will tear you up. No matter what happens, it is a conscious decision to embrace your surroundings and how that affects you determines what you will get out of it. Nothing is perfect. I've tried to embrace everything here, I have been through some bad, emotionally exhausting experiences, let people in with perhaps too much trust. Some have enriched my life, some have ground me into the floor. The extreme emotions I feel in this place cannot be described. It is as if everything is heightened, my senses are on edge. I feel as though I have cried as much as I have laughed. 

 One minute I am so sure of myself and the next, I feel like I am back to where I began. As soon as I feel confident, this life throws me another curve. It is a constant process of discoveries and I wonder if I will ever feel at ease with myself. Ever find that balance of the girl who blindly left Minnesota 2 months ago to the girl I am today and who I will be two months from now...
Two months ago I had no idea how I could transition into this new country, with the new language, new culture, and feel comfortable because honestly every day is a struggle, the simplest of things take so much effort and concentration, but then those struggles turn into accomplishments. We made it through another day, week, month...
“To my mind, the greatest reward and luxury of travel is to be able to experience everyday things as if for the first time, to be in a position in which almost nothing is so familiar it is taken for granted.” 
–Bill Bryson
Now I am afraid of how I am going to transition back into my old life. What am I supposed to take with me, I want to take it all, but the two lives don't mesh. Do I compromise all I have learned and become to fit comfortably into who I used to be? Or do I start fresh and discover all over again how to fit into life in the US. Time will tell and the growing, changing, discovering will not come to a halt simply because I am once again home- because those surroundings will no longer be familiar to me anymore. 

 I let myself do things, become susceptible to things, I would have held myself against before. What for? The chase, the drama, the preconceived notions? No one knows. But these experiences, day by day are real, they are part of my life. From the beginning I was never looking to take part in a journey that would only last 4 months of my life and I'd take home a picture book to stow away. I wanted something Real, to be apart of life here, not just a visitor. To make friends, be apart of the scenery, become a regular, fall in love with anything and everything, to accept the bad times for what they are because this is my LIFE, I'm not just a passerby tourist coming to see the sights, I want to be apart of those sights. 
 “Travel is more than the seeing of sights; it is a change that goes on, deep and permanent, in the ideas of living.” –Miriam Beard
With this in mind, I think I have accomplished quite a bit. Everything bad that has happened to me I do not see as "ruining my trip." Difficulties in relationships, fighting with parents, struggles with the communication, decision making, Grandpa being sick, the constant struggle of differentiating being "here" and "there," money, planning, the list goes on... Everyone insists there is no time for bad feelings or crying, no estoy de acuerdo. Dwelling on those times is destructive, but to feel and act on those bad times is simply living and part of being human, and accepting everything that is coming at you. That is the difference. Having no regrets at the end of the day, that is the point. It doesn't mean that everything was perfect all the time, it simply means you learned from both the good and bad, made yourself a bigger and better person, and moved on. No Regrets. 
“Traveling is a brutality. It forces you to trust strangers and to lose sight of all that familiar comfort of home and friends. You are constantly off balance. Nothing is yours except the essential things – air, sleep, dreams, the sea, the sky – all things tending towards the eternal or what we imagine of it.”
– Cesare Pavese
Looking back now, I cannot believe how much I have learned from the time I arrived til now. I am so excited to see what is in store for me for the next 2 months. Time really is going by quickly, yet I have mountains of pictures, memories, and lessons learned from the first two months, that I cannot imagine the collection I will have once December 19th comes along.

 They say home is where the heart is, my home is now in Chile as well. A part of me will always remain here. It has been a couple months for the ages my friends. I look forward to being home in Minnesota in two months for the big and little things of friends, family, coffee shops, pedicures, homemade Christmas cookies, my long lost wardrobe, having an income, my shoe collection, pets...Yet those are all things I miss and will be able to see again. Chile is a place I will carry around with me and perhaps never get to see again. Therefore, embracing everything because it's my one shot. So as I look out my window at the sun shining, blue skies, and the little kids running and yelling in Spanish, I smile and my heart is filled with joy at this opportunity and journey I am experiencing. Challenges that push me to my absolute limit, and then some. Making me realize I am stronger than I know and I am so lucky to have that opportunity.

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain